Friday, January 11, 2008

...uhm, damnit...

So much for "what I figured out flipping burgers..."

Jen McKenzie Leeland TAGGED me. And I have this thing about challenges/contests/more-macho-than-thou chest beating. (must be the guy in me, lol...and no, that's not a pun)

So...the rules, ma'ams and me'sirs. And you poor people who I tagged, yeah--I feel for you.

Link to the person who tagged you;
Leave a comment on their blog so that their readers can visit yours;
Post the rules on your blog;
Share 7 random and/or weird facts about yourself on your blog;
Tag 7 random people at the end of your post;
Include links to their blogs;
Let each person know that they have been tagged by leaving a comment on their blog


--and then what I was originally going to write, lol...uhm, after the links.

1) I grew up in Hawaii, my Chinese great-grandma was a "picture-bride" and my great-grandpa was an indentured servant--which goes to show you the past really isn't so past. What I remember about her is the nursing home, the "chinese cherry" trees and how my mom would always take her pork hash dim sum from the Manapua shop.

2) I used to enter pastry competitions. My favorite entry was Rustic Chocolate-dipped Praline Flutes with White Chocolate Strawberry ganache. It won two categories and would have won People's choice if the tie-breaking judge hadn't eaten the mint leaf garnish by mistake. They did cookbooks on the winning recipes when Johnson and Wales finally packed up and rolled on out of here, so I'm in a cookbook. Somewhere.

3) The Scots-Irish side of my family is from Louisiana. I tried to do a genealogy once, but I couldn't get past 1842 because I'm too lazy to spend time "learning" genealogy research skills, and censuses are hard on the eyes. I did find out I had an ancestor named Lemial, which I thought was pretty cool.

4) I can tell the temperature of a meat product by touching it. I hit medium 10 out of 10 times, and five out of ten times, people send it back, because they don't know what medium really looks like.

5) I own three chef coats (black), four pairs of black jeans, a garbage bag full of black athletic socks, two black undershirts with little skulls on them, four biotherms (they get lost in my pocket, honest!), shit-kickers, and a black ball-cap. If you turn the light off and I cover my face, you can't see me.

6) I collect amber. I have pounds of necklaces, bracelets, earrings and I know every random fact there is to know about it, including how to spot fakes. I never wear it. My husband says I look horrible in amber, and I do--but every now and then I put EVERYTHING on and gloat.

7) First time I ever visited Richmond, (history is still alive and well in Richmond...) I saw an actual honest-to-goodness "bathroom attendant" and asked her and her assistant if they liked hanging out listening to people fart. She escorted me to my stall (part of the job, lol) and said, "no, ma'am. I have air freshener."


you must all play. Or come up with excuses...

  • Unhingey

  • Alice Has GREAT Food, and other stuff

  • Cowboy--c'mon, you KNOW you want to...

  • Gwen, who's too nice to turn me down

  • Kaige

  • Lauren's brand-new blog

  • and last, but not least...Jeanne

  • The Candy Guru

  • which makes seven...

    "what I discovered flipping burgers..."

    Back in October, I did an exercise over at RD on “stream of conscious”. Nobody ever replied, which in a way was good, because sometimes I wonder what the hell I’m thinking when I do things that eat my time.

    I’d been working on stream of conscious as a block-buster, and I think that’s what happened to me last night. My exercise linked with “common mistakes and how to fix them”.

    The way I figure it, if you write a scene straight through, no stopping, you get the base template for that scene. You know what goes where and why, and who says what, when. With that knowledge--go ahead, do a rewrite stream of conscious style, using your senses. Kind of “look” at the scene, feel what’s around you. Is it windy? Does it smell bad--y’know, layer in texture...

    But it’s been months, and I’ve been thinking about lots of stuff, trying to push my craft skills. Stream-of-conscious and layering are now part of my toolbox.

    When I added in “white room” problems, I got a nail gun.

    White Room Phenomenon

    What is it: The author gives little to no description. You don’t know where you are, what the scene is.

    What does it look like: Charlie sat in his office and took the file. The room felt hot, claustrophobic. He opened a window and went back to his work. The door opened and she came in.

    A story is only as good as the world it creates. The world is only as rich as the writer’s descriptions.

    How to fix it: Charlie sat the scarred pressboard desk and took another parole application from the drawer. The room, a renovated janitor’s closet, felt hot, claustrophobic. He turned on the fan by his foot (note: b/c a janitor’s closet wouldn’t have a window) and went back to his work. The door opened and she came in.

    I have the base template, the environment--wind and temps and stuff. With “white room”, I have the gravel crunching underfoot, tight khaki pants and little jasmine bushes.

    All at the same time...

    Because from step A, I can skip point B and go straight to C, expanding as I go.

    lol, I found my window.


    Jeanna said...

    I'm no candy guru, just a ched who needs a column. Fascinating. If you get a Golden Retriever you'll have to name her Amber. I can't believe that judge ate the garnish.
    Chinese Irish-Scottish, eh, that's some combo.

    Unhinged said...

    You're an unofficial chef. And I'm officially hungry. It's fate.

    You know what I think about chefs, though? That they must have bad backs from leaning so far over those fancy dishes they create (and I'm talking almost nose-to-meat). Have YOU ever accidently stuck your nose into something you were making?


    I'll play, but it may be a day or two because there's a bunch of spam on my computer from all those porn sites I visit, and I have to get it cleaned up.

    Gwen Hayes said...

    One of these days I will surprise you and you will think, "That Gwen girl isn't nearly as nice as I thought she was." is where I blogged.


    Alice Audrey said...

    Seven things? Seven? I'm not that interesting.

    Jeanna said...

    Oh, there are rules...I break out in hives from rules, but I did give you seven in the Comments section this morning (it's still morning if All My Children is on).
    You are a chef, aren't you. Thanks for that nose image, unhinged, it will help me with my diet.

    Lauren Murphy said...

    Ok seriously this is the most horrible thing that has ever happened to me!! Ever! I got tagged not once but twice. I don't have that much to say about myself! *sigh*

    jodi said...

    lol...yes, I am really actually not a chef. Chefs are those people who run a kitchen and/or restaurant in an independent, sometimes it's used as a catch-all title for a person who develops menus or graduated from culinary. In a corporate kitchen, like I belong to--a chef is called a KM, or kitchen manager. They do the same thing without the creative aspects. Corporate restaurants are like Olive Garden, Ruth Chris and the Cheesecake Factory.

    uhm, I used to be a KM. I dropped out to focus on the training side of culinary, and dropped out of that to focus on writing. Right now, I'm what's called a "line lead", in other words, an upper level cook. Most of us specialize. I specialize in grill-work., and no, I've never stuck my nose into a dish. I've never--even in a fancy independent, seen anyone bend down to eye level. Once you've done something a couple of hundred times, you can do a vertical stack in seconds without even looking. And sometimes you do hundreds in one shift.

    Jennifer McKenzie said...

    I want to cook like you when I grow up.
    Great list. I'm so glad you played EVEN though I know you cursed me the whole time.

    jodi said...

    yes, it was evil of you, because finding weird stuff was hard. But I do gloat on amber. That part wasn't hard--and all my laundry is black.

    Morgan St. John said...

    I think you should post a picture of amber. I don't really know what it looks like [not that I can't google it! but I'm just saying!]. I did like Elizabeth Lowell's book called Amber Beach...I think that's what it's called. I might be the only one, though. Oh well. GREAT blog. My cousin is a chef. I LOVE visiting with him! YUM.

    Alice Audrey said...

    I didn't say I wouldn't do it, just that it wouldn't be interesting. I'll post it Tuesday.