It's been a long month. I have no clue why I back-to-back my workshops, except maybe I think better that way. Dust has piled up on my bookshelves, and laundry in the hall. My kids have turned into trolls, barricaded behind a wall of empty soda cans and old plates.
My daughter says she knows when the workshops are ending, because chocolate chip pancakes show up for breakfast and the sink is clear. She also says she knows I'm gearing up for another consultation, because the freezer is full of frozen dinners. She's probably right. I'm a couple of days behind.
I feel a little lost and depressed, headed back to work. They just got another shipment of Wordfind magazines, and my boss put out fresh pencils. I was doing a jumble the other day, and after staring at it for five minutes, I still couldn't figure out what it meant. Maybe I need to get a different job. The job happiness quotient at work seems directly tied to how well you do wordfind--in the proper way, circling each individual letter so you can figure out the jumble at the end.
I got some sleep last night--a rarity nowadays, and woke up with a black moment. Maybe I'm just older or something, but image doesn't mean as much. I used to have this dream--way back when, that one day I'd write a hardback book and show it to my parents so they could finally, after all this time, be proud of me. We all dance to the tune of childhood issues. My version of conscious want and subconscious motivation--like Janet says, combined as one goal.
But, the whole hardbound reference book thing isn't me. It'd be nice and all, and something spiffy for my bookshelves, but most NY, writer's digest, and self-pubbed craft books carry a fairly decent price tag--hell even the lecture packets from some people cost upwards of twenty bucks. And I'm not trying to gouge anyone. I was thinking...maybe a 6.99 kindle/e-book? At a 70 percent royalty rate, that gives me five bucks, which I think is a fair price.
Nice cover--no clue, but something nice. I like the blueprint paper on the Story Structure Architect. And I lean toward abstracts--which doesn't make sense since I also like the idea of fire in the darkness, although it'll probably end up being blue.
I also like the way I can update things, and maybe continue the series--do a few multimedia tie-ins on my needs-to-be-updated site. All I had to do was let go of what I wanted and think about "why" I wanted it.
I probably just needed to talk to people who could see core events as I saw it, and for that I'm grateful to everyone in my Transformational Arc and Running in the Dark workshops. It's hard to think "movement" when everyone else is thinking "crazy".
I hope to have everything formatted--all the bits and pieces and connecting chapters--soon. And get it out there in an accessible way. Lol, I always told Deanna I was writing the Theory and Practice of Pantsing in a 1000 easy lessons.