Wednesday, September 8, 2010

Gratitude

My car looked very sad, all scrunched up with the doors hanging at weird angles and the front bumper missing. The trooper said every accident people walk away from is a good accident, and I guess it was a good accident. I didn't just walk, I ran.

It might have been the way the engine was hissing and spewing, but all I could think was--"Get out. Get out. Now!" Although--yeah, pragmatic me--first thing I did after I made sure nothing was bleeding or broken was grab my purse and glasses, and make sure I had my registration. Then I got out. The door was stuck and that's probably where I got the bruised knee because I almost ripped it off the hinges on my way out.

After they towed me and my car to the impound yard, I stood there looking. In the soft twilight and drizzle, out on a quiet side street by the river. There was a Burger King bag in the back seat, a couple of napkins--a map book and crow food. An old Krispy Kreme hat from VA and a few packets of salt. Barely forty thousand miles. I rarely drive long distances. New tires, only two thousand miles old. Winter's coming, and I'd thought about chains.

I'd had thoughts the other day, about bumper stickers and paint jobs. Thinking about a nice dusty gray-green. Not many more payments. Only another two years.

I'm grateful I walked away although I'm afraid to lay down. Adrenaline trickles out and pain trickles in. My shoulder hurts, my chest really hurts, and my knee just wants to curl up on a bed, but the great thing about doctors is that they can make you feel lucky. I didn't burn myself on the air bag. I didn't shatter my forearm in eight pieces. I didn't break my nose and cheeks, and I didn't die. I'm most grateful for that.

I might not have a car anymore--the very first one I'd bought on my own in my favorite color with the seat that was just the perfect fit, but I still have things to do and places to go. Maybe later. Right now, I'm going to pop a vicodin and go to sleep.

8 comments:

Hailey Edwards said...

Thank God you're all right! Air bags save lives, but they can do hella damage to your face. It sounds like you were very lucky.

Are you sure you're okay? Feeling any better today?

Jennifer Leeland said...

OH MY GOD!!!!! I'm totally siccing Gwen on you!
I hope you're okay! I'm worried now. I'm so sorry about your car.

deanna said...

Oh, no! So sorry, Jodi, but so thankful you lived through it. Like Hailey and Jennifer said, I hope you're okay. Saying a prayer. It sucks to lose a car that fit so well.

Gwen Hayes said...

holy cows--you okay? Yer likely to be really sore today. Take it easy on yourself.

jodi said...

I'm okay. Really really sore, but okay. lol, Gwen. It's my day off. Guess I'm spending it with a bottle of painkillers.

Thank you for your prayers, Deanna. :) I'm very glad. It sucks to lose the car, but I'm very grateful. It's just a car even if I really liked it.

Jen, maybe it's a good thing. I got home after the emergency room and thought about life and what would happen if I died right here and now, hugged my kids (who said my karma well is running dry) and wrote long into the night.

I think I'm okay, Hailey. More focused, very sore. I'll probably call in later today and let them know I need tomorrow off. :)

(((hugs)))

thanks for being here

Michelle (MG) Braden said...

Oh my GOd! Cup!!! And the doctors are right. You were lucky and we're all blessed to still have you. And trust me the airbag burns and breaks your sternum cartilage and that's no fun at all. I'll give you only a gentle squeeze when I see you in less than a month, but a squeeze you will get!!

jodi said...

lol, MG. I told my kid a long time ago, nothing would ever stop me from coming home. And nothing ever will. But yeah--I'd appreciate a gentle hug. My shoulders and chest are killing me. :(

Anonymous said...

Holy crap.

You know, people always give you the cycnical eye when you try and tell them you never know what's around the bend and you have to live like it's your last-it's sucks, knowing that, and yet it's a blessing.

I'm glad your still here to cross one more thing off your list.


Eva